cruelty
i think cruelty as it feels and as it is are different
truth can feel cruel (why? would i rather have something beautiful?)
REALLY ASK MYSELF THAT
I know I need the truth and without it... what is an obsession...
but then why am I afraid of looking at myself? all the way down?
this is only the truth isn't it?
would I RATHER BE SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL (at his cost... because i am not so beautiful... so beautiful only to myself...) OR TRUE
and why